Duh-Ha!

Ah-ha moments are what we are constantly striving for in our training….and I suppose in life really.  Those moments where everything finally comes together and makes sense.  Where our minds are blown.  Where we are so proud and excited about our discoveries that we can’t wait to share them with others.

I don’t know about anyone else.  But my Ah-ha moments are few and far between. Not because I don’t work hard and put the effort in.  But because they are just so special that they simply don’t happen on a regular basis.

The moments that I tend to have alot of are what I like to call “Duh-ha” moments.  And I think that maybe these moments don’t quite get the credit or attention they deserve.

Let me share an example.  I’ve been working pretty diligently on a sequence in the Tai Chi Short Form (and Long form) called “repulsing the monkey”.  I’ve really struggled with this section for a long time but recently, due to a 1-on-1, I knew it needed some dedicated focus and I became invested in improving it.  I knew already that I tend to rush through this portion…as much as you can rush Tai Chi that is.  So I made my first course of action to slow down and really start listening to my body.  Repetition after repetition after sloooooooow repetition.  And then suddenly, in a rare moment of true awareness, I literally felt the exact moment that my right femoral head (the ball) turned in my acetabulum (the socket) and initiated the next step… (yes I looked that up to get the proper terminology, lol).  It wasn’t my hips that initiated the move and the rotation.  It was that very precise point in my right hip.  Again, not my hips…not plural.  And in my head the thought was “Oooooooooooh…..so thaaaaat’s my hip”.  And yes…even while I write this, I want to say “duh”.  Lol.  But I had always sort of considered my hips as one thing.  And so perhaps, subconsciously, that’s how I attempt to move them. But I have two. A left and a right.  Just like I have a left and right elbow.  A left and right knee.  A left and right shoulder.  I think because they are the center of my body…the center of my power, I just always thought of them as one thing..as that whole section really.  

Upon this realization, my initial reaction was “holy crap this is awesome!”(Ah-HA!)….immediately followed by…”oh gawd I am such a dummy…this is obviously so obvious.”(Duh).  And so when I get a double reaction like that, there’s my Duh-Ha moment. 

I also experience a lot of Duh-Ha moments while I blog.  I typically will start off thinking I have something so insightful and NEW to share…and then suddenly by the time I get to the end, I realize this is something I already know..that everyone likely knows…and that it is so very obvious. Sometimes I’ve even been tempted to scrap the blog altogether…delete it quickly and never publish it to the team, in fear of looking silly.  Instead, I typically end up sharing these moments with someone privately, and realize through discussion that these aren’t stupid moments at all. Rather, they are moments of clarity.  They are moments where something suddenly clicks.  Where obvious knowledge becomes just a little more obvious.  

Most importantly, they are proof that, even between the bigger Ah-Ha moments, I am boldly moving forward on this journey, where my understanding of things, my definition of things, is ever changing and constantly evolving.  Always good.  Never dumb.

Duh.