1 x 10 OR 10 x 1

I think the biggest challenge I face continues to be finding peace in the slow and steady progress.

I am constantly questioning my success. Wondering why I can't do "this" or "that" by now. Feeling like maybe I'm not doing enough. Or that I'm not doing the right things.

But logically, I know this isn't the case. I can actually SEE this isn't the case from both my blogging and from tracking my numbers. In fact, if I look back to when I first started, I'm doing much MUCH more. So why do I feel as though I'm not making as much progress now as I did then?

It took me a while to sort this out...but
I think I have a reasonable answer. I think my progress seems slow, or non existent at times, because of exactly what I said above. It's because I'm doing more.

At the start of my Kung Fu journey, I was learning, and working on, a handful of things. All of my time, all of my focus, was devoted to these. And so I saw tremendous (and obvious) progress. Slowly, over time, I added more and more...and more....and then some more...and then tripled and doubled it all. Unfortunately my available time and focus did NOT increase by this same rate.

My effort is still there. My commitment is still there. The hard work is still there. It's just spread across many different areas of both necessity and passion. Divided amongst all the aspects of Kung Fu and Kung Fu inspired projects and initiatives. More forms, more techniques, more skills, meditation, chi, teaching, pottery, gardening, drumming, and so on. All things that have developed and expanded because of Kung Fu. All deserving of my attention and focus. All providing passion and excitement to me and my life. I'm sure I could sacrifice some of these things. But currently, I feel these things are all serving me in a positive way. They are all adding value to me and my Kung Fu as a whole.

So it's not that I'm not making as much progress as I have in the past. It's simply that it's smaller amounts of progress in many more things. And when you look at the small bits as a whole, it's still pretty tremendous.

I would also imagine that this continues as a person advances....and so I better just find peace with the slow and steady progress.