1000 Side Heel Kicks

1000 side heel kicks complete.  I feel much better after doing this challenge.

Not because I have suddenly mastered the side heel...far from it.  But by doing this many repetitions together I was able to assess a large sampling and gain some more accurate insight into my progress.

As I worked on these kicks, I found myself thinking about the 70-20-10 theory. There are many versions and spin-offs of this, but specific to this challenge, this meant that 700 of my kicks would be okay, about 200 would be downright awful, and only about 100 would be awesome.  I like this theory for a couple of reasons.  For one, it reiterates the fact that in order to achieve a larger quantity of awesome kicks, I simply need to throw more kicks.  And I will learn a heck of alot more from throwing 100 awesome kicks out of 1000 than I will from 1 out of 10.  Secondly, it helps me adjust my expectations.  I will never throw 100% awesome kicks.  Because my definition of awesome is ever-changing.  As are my definitions of "okay" and "awful".

By committing to this large number of kicks in a shorter period of time, I realized the following,

What used to be my "awful"...is now non-existent.

What I now consider just "okay"...I used to think was awesome.

And my new "awesome" kicks are ones that I never even used to experience.

It can be harmful to assess progress based solely on 1 class, or 1 kick.  It can also be harmful to compare where I am now, to where I eventually want to be.

Progress and success should be measured by how far I've come....not how far I still want to go.  This is a lesson I really need to remember.

I AM Engaged

I'm going to share a funny story today.

A while back I found myself in a conversation with Ms Csillag at one of our IHC classes.  I can't remember the conversation exactly....it was something about "old people".  During this conversation I did the "raise the roof" arm pump.  She was gracious enough to tell me that this particular movement, in fact, made ME old.  Don't get me wrong!!  She did this very kindly...although I'm 100% certain she was laughing behind that mask.  But I can't blame her.

And so imagine my excitement when my 9 year old daughter taught me something that all the young kids do now.  I was pumped to show this new skill off to Ms Csillag at my next opportunity.

Me:  "Check this out Ms Csillag!"

Ms Csillag: watching with amusement

Me: "This is called Dapping!" - performs movement

Ms Csillag: tearing up with laughter...."I need to get that image out of my brain!"

Me:  confused..."Why??  Is this not a thing?"

Ms Csillag:  walks away trying to control her laughter

Okay.  So turns out that it's not called "dapping"...but instead "daBBing".  And I did more of a Hussain Bolt celebration than anything else.  Also turns out this has been a thing since 2015...it might even be untrendy by this point.

Why do I tell you this story?  I don't know...mostly for a laugh I suppose.

But it also got me thinking about engagement.  And how there are so many different ways to engage.  Kwoon Talk.  Challenges,  Events.  One on ones.  Etc.  But engagement, for me, goes even further.  Developing personal relationships with my team-mates and engaging beyond Kung Fu can take things to a whole new level.  Developing that comradery is what truly makes me feel part of a team.

Engagement can't happen alone.  Engagement only happens when you interact with others.  And every act of engagement has potential.  Potential to inspire...to motivate...to teach...to incite change...or maybe even just to make someone laugh.

It Makes Sense Today...We'll See About Tomorrow

I am hesitant to admit out loud that I am making progress with my side heel.  After many repetitions, I am feeling more balanced, more centered, more grounded and overall, more confident.  I have not mastered anything, but I am making headway.  In fact, I felt a shift the other day where I knew, undeniably, that I had thrown a few kicks that were strong and pure.  It felt as though I had no other thoughts in my head other than my heel making impact with my target and every other part of my body just did what it needed to do.  My efforts continue and I hope to make those pure kicks outweigh the others.

Further to this, I realize I am also developing my understanding of the 6 harmonies, specifically when it comes to Intent.

Initially we learn the individual steps of a technique.  In this case, the side heel.

Bow stance. Crane.  Pivot.  Kick.  Pivot.  Crane.  Bow stance.  

Along with this, we have many details we are trying to remember and implement as well.  

Guards up.  Drive from hip.  Toes down.  Blade foot.  Heel out. 

Slowly, over time and with many repetitions, these individual moves and details start to become more fluid.  

Bow Stance, crane, pivot, kick, pivot, crane, bow stance.

Guards up, drive from hip, toes down, blade foot, heel out.

Then, after more time and more repetitions, 

Bowstancecranepivotkickpivotcranebowstanceguardsupdrivefromhiptoesdownbladefootheelout.

And then, hopefully, we eventually start to approach it as one motion, rather than several.  The separate moves and the separate details within those moves, become one...

Side Heel Kick

But it's not that each move and detail is no longer there, it's just that they are happening so quickly, so fluidly, so harmoniously, that it feels like one pure technique.

And I started to think that perhaps intent works, and develops, in this same way.

With each and every physical component in a technique...with each and every fine detail...there is intent.  Many, many little moments of different intent.  But again, over time, as we complete more and more repetitions, these many bits of intent become more and more fluid...the transitions between each happen faster and faster...perhaps some even start to happen simultaneously....until, just like with the physical part of a technique, it will eventually seem like one single intent.  Again, it's not that those original bits of intent are gone, they are just working in such complete harmony that it feels like there was really only one intent from the start.

Why is this important?  I can't say for sure because my brain is tired from all the thinking.  I can see some other thoughts veering off on different tangents, but I will refrain from following them just now.

But I do think that because I didn't really understand how complex intent was, I found myself trying to almost force my intent to get my desired outcome.  Not realizing that I need to develop my intent, just like I would develop physical skill.  I always thought of "pure intent" as just one single focus.  But I think when our intent is pure, it's more that all the many bits of different intent are working in perfect harmony.  And that will take time.

I also think that when technique is pure and intent is pure, that's when those rare moments of perfection happen....those rare moments of effortless effort.

Although I could also be dead wrong about all of this.  But it makes sense today.

Feb Clean Eating

Well...I've been meaning to write this blog for a while.  But it's a bummer, so I wasn't all that concerned about getting it done.

I completed my February Clean Eating.  And I use the term "completed" to simply mean that February is over.  The only "complete" part of it was that it was a complete fail.  I did well for the first week, and then after that it was a crap shoot.  

Why did I fail?  I could spout off a bunch of reasons...long days...late, last minute dinners...no time to plan...kid sick...diet differences in the family...

But if I'm totally honest with myself, I didn't really try.  If I had wanted it bad enough, I would have made it a priority.

So I suppose that will be what I need to change for June.  I'll need to make it more of a priority and put in some honest effort.

I AM Open-minded

At a recent 1-on-1, we spoke of "absolutes".  This conversation has become one of those real eye opening moments that has filtered into several different aspects of my life already.

Absolutes are exactly that, absolute.  They are rigid and unyielding.  They are black and white. We are often unwilling to negotiate a view when we hold an absolute belief or opinion.  It is the same if we steadfastly resist someone else's absolute.  

When we live with absolutes guiding us, it can make it difficult to change and to grow.  It can keep empathy and understanding out of reach.  And I think it can often cause more turmoil than not, by keeping our spirit bound, when it should be free.

This can quickly become very confusing, very fast.  And I don't have it all quite figured out...nor do I ever expect to, as I'm sure it will be ever-changing.

But what I have come to understand is that if I can avoid being stubbornly bound to absolutes, not only will my spirit be more at peace, but nothing will ever be out of reach.

Get It? Got It. Good? Nope!

As I was practicing my hand form at class last night, I was becoming increasingly confused with one portion.  In this particular sequence, I begin in a horse stance with a palm heel strike to the right.  I then slide my right foot in, pivot clockwise 90 degrees and slide my right foot back out so I end up in a left lead high back stance with an inside hooking block. Every single time I checked my stance I was misaligned.  That right foot in the high back stance always ended up behind, in front, foot turned way out, etc. Never where it should be.  Even if I concentrated and thought exactly about how I wanted my stance to end, it still didn't work.

As I tried to trouble shoot, I found myself thinking about intent.  I had gotten some recent feedback on my form, which was that my intent wasn't quite there yet because I was anticipating what was coming next.  This is typical in preliminary development.  In initial stages, a person is simply trying to remember the different moves, and not so much worried about intent quite yet.  I also thought about how many times I've been told that if I'm not getting the result I want, it's because I don't have the right intent.....Look at that Sifus!!  Stuff is sinking in!!  

Anyhow, I went through things again, this time ensuring that my intent remained pure and I remained in the moment.  I focused on my target and moved my body based on that.  And I only worked on that single move.  I'm sure you can all guess what the result was....Yup, I ended up in perfect alignment and my stance was true.  With my intent pure and true, my body followed suit.

I always find it funny when I "realize" something that I've been told a gazillion times.  I mean, I understand the information I'm getting, on an intellectual level.  But only once I actually feel it, in action, does it finally resonate.  And not only that, but I've had these aha moments with intent before.  Each and every time I think the same thing..."Oh wait.  NOW I get it."  Next time..."Oh wait. No NOW I get it."  And this occurs over and over.

I wonder where I will be and what I will be doing when I ACTUALLY finally get it.  If I had to guess, I would say it will never happen.  I tend to think this feeling is infinite and everchanging, which I suppose fits with a life towards mastery.  

Getting IT changes as I change, because as I change, IT changes.

Dragging Along

I find myself in a dark mental space today.  I don't want to be here...I don't really know why I'm here...and I probably really shouldn't be here..but here I am, nonetheless.  And sometimes the moment I hit "publish" on a blog like this, my mind suddenly clears and I feel silly for posting it in the first place.  Here's to hoping.

Overall I think I continue to progress.  In some things more than others, which is obviously normal.  There are probably even a couple things that I would say I'm pretty good at.  Things that I am somewhat strong in.  

But as we all know, strengths don't exist without weaknesses.

Kicks continue to be my main weakness.  My side heel remains poor.  My roundhouse not much better.  And I can't throw a decent spinning back kick to save my life.  Even my front thrust kick could be better at this stage.

There is a reason why I decided to pursue the hand form I have.  And that was to challenge my kicks.  Challenge this weakness.  And I understand that challenging myself in this way will come with dark days.  Days where I feel frustrated.  Days where things just feel crap.  Days where I wonder how, or if, I will ever succeed.

I know the advice I would give someone else..."Trust the process and keep going.  Even the smallest amount of progress is still progress."

Unfortunately my mind cannot align with that logic today.  Today, regardless of what progress I have or haven't made with my kicks...real, perceived or somewhere in between...I am simply not happy with my current skill level.  I feel that I am at a point where the gap between my kicks and everything else is so vast, that it's actually starting to pull me back.  I imagine I'm trying to run forward, but there's a bungee cord tied around my waist....the other end tied to my kicks.  I can only go so far before I get pulled back again.

And so here I am...trying to figure out how to drag these kicks along somehow.

More kicks I guess.

Dou Ti - March Progress

I think I finally have my hand form mostly worked out.  Although I should probably really call this a "foot" form.  Lol.  

There are a few areas that don't flow quite like I'm hoping, but I'm going to give myself some time to let repetition work out most of the kinks.  If, by our Beta version deadline, these parts still don't seem to fit, I may have to re-work a few things. 

Obviously I'm still choppy and haven't quite found my flow yet.  I can also see in my video that I'm anticipating the next move, rather than really focusing on the technique I'm on.  But that's to be expected since I'm still learning my form.  All those finer details will work themselves out as I move through the process.  I hope.  😉

I'm including a video of my form, not only for your entertainment, but so I have a baseline for comparison as I progress.

And by the way...for those of you that submitted sequences to me last November, watch for yours!  🙂

I AM…A Few Things

Back in November, as I prepared my personal requirements for the Year of the Tiger, I initially made a goal to take a formal class or course on working with children.  I did this because I had been helping at the kids’ classes and thought I should learn more on this subject.  I soon started to doubt that particular approach and quickly realized that, these kids themselves, would be my best resource.

Each and every child that comes into the Kwoon is different than the next.  Each one has their own strengths and weaknesses.  They have confidence in some things and fear in others.  They have their good days and their bad.  They each have very different and very unique needs.  There is never just one approach.  And even with the same child, that approach will change often.  

But regardless of the diversity between each child, I have somehow still managed to develop a connection with each of them.  How?  I believe my success is due to following their lead and then following my own instinct.  I’ve realized that by being patient and listening closely…not just to their words…and not just with my ears…they will eventually tell me exactly what they need.

I AM patient…I AM listening…I AM intuitive. 

Such a simple approach, yet has proven so valuable in this, and many other things.

Numbers Are Hard

I have tracked, recorded and publicly posted my IHC requirements diligently since joining the team last year.

Initially, I was under the impression that sharing my numbers was required.  However, I continued posting my numbers each month, even once I discovered it was not.  I found it to be a valuable tool for staying on track, staying motivated and keeping myself accountable.

I use an app that typically keeps me on track day to day.  As I near the end of each month, I become more and more aware of where my numbers are.  If I'm behind in something, that commitment I've made to publicly share my numbers typically gives me the boost I need to get my butt in gear.  If I can at all avoid being in a deficit for my monthly posting, I will.  Just the other day, I saw I had let my sparring numbers get a little behind.  Sparring is my most difficult requirement.  But on February 28, when I looked at that red -14.5 next to that requirement, I buckled down and worked my butt off for 15 minutes of hard sparring work.  It was tough, but it was good, and I was back on track.  Knowing that I would be sharing that number with the team is what motivated me to do that.  If it were just me, it would have been very easy to tell myself I'd catch up later...and then not.

Sharing my numbers, or my progress with any of my goals really, has been a huge factor in my overall success.  And I question what might happen if I were to stop.  If I don't share them, will I still care as much?  I know that sounds like a terrible attitude, but I'm not sure I would.  If I fell behind, and I was the only one that really knew, would it even matter?  Maybe I should rephrase.  Yes it would still matter.  But would it have the same influence on me, my motivation and my progress?  I don't think it would.

If I'm not recording my numbers, they aren't really happening.

If I'm not sharing my numbers, they aren't having the same effect.

IHC Number Update - March 2, 2022

My March IHC Update - Approximately 8% into the Year of the Tiger

Year of the Tiger - Feb 1, 2022 to Jan 20, 2023 (353 days)

✅ = achieving/exceeding my numbers or generally on track where numbers don't really apply.  

❌ = behind on my numbers or things aren't going well, where numbers don't apply.

➖ = unsure of progress, the opportunity hasn't presented itself yet, it may take the full year to properly evaluate, or it's something I would need my instructors to determine my success/failure.  I've decided to still list these things here just as a reminder that they are still requirements.

Base Requirements

✅ Hand Form - Dou Ti (aka My Doody Form)  87/1000

✅ Weapon Form - Stick 1 and 2  86/1000

✅ Push-ups  4296/50,000

✅ Sit-ups  4120/50,000

✅ Sparring  86/1000

✅ Kilometers 144/1609

✅ Acts of Kindness 126/1000

✅ Blogging/Online Presence

✅ Unexcused Absences

➖ Mastery by Stewart Emery

✅ Mend a Relationship

➖ Lion Dancing - Instructors call

➖ Tiger Challenge

➖ Public Performances

➖ Core Curriculum - Instructors call

✅ SRKF Projects and Initiatives

Personal Requirements

➖ Learn how to reclaim my pottery clay

➖ Establish a 15 minute/2km run time

⭐ Box Jumps - WOOOOOOOO!!!!!

✅ Monthly date with Dan

➖ Lion Dance Drumming

✅ Weekend Kung Fu Training with Kids

✅ Chi Development

✅ 3 x 1 Month "Clean Eating Challenge" - I completed February.  Whether I was actually successful or not will be addressed in a dedicated blog.

✅ Record Numbers of all known forms.  There is no specific number I'm trying to reach.  My personal requirement is simply to record them.

• Awakening the Dragon = 0 *I would love to cover this one in-person in class.  I've covered a few things in one-on-ones, but I think I need an in-person refresher.   HINT, HINT.
• Broadsword 1-2 = 3
• Da Mu Hsing 1-5 = 19
• Hsieh Chien = 4
• Lao Gar 1-3 = 5
• Long 1 = 6

I DID IT!!!!!

I actually did it.

I went downstairs just now to take a break from work and do some stick reps.....while also thinking about needing to post my numbers today.  Of course my mind went to my carry-over goal that I failed to complete last year.  The goal following me around like a big dark cloud.  I was tired of that damn red X next to that goal all the time.

I thought about setting up my camera, but told myself to forget it or I'd lose my nerve.  I put on my runners (my magic running shoes in fact!!...coincidence?....I wonder....), and walked up to my box.  I immediately pushed it away.

Arguing with myself a little more, I managed to convince myself I had to at least do something with it.  So I pushed it into the corner at an angle, so I'd have one wall angled out to my left and one to the right.  I told myself to balance myself with the walls if I had to...and so I did.  And I did 10.

And so again, the argument continued in my mind.  If I can do them using the walls for balance, why the heck not without?????  I had no legitimate reason.

And so I did 11 more, free of any wall support.  Why 11, and not just the 10?  

Because I could.

I DID IT!!!!!  I ACTUALLY DID IT!  WOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!