Amicable Accountability

Many of my requirements and goals didn't make it too far off the ground this year, but there was one focus from which I achieved results and benefits far beyond what I ever anticipated.  It has advanced my Kung Fu in so many ways, some of which I have only scratched the surface.

So why?  What made this one thing different from the others?  Why did I feel so invested in it over anything else?  How did I stay motivated in a consistent way?  How did it stay exciting and inspiring to me throughout the whole year?

The answer is Accountability.

Although we are part of a team, we are still working as individuals.  Yes, the team is counting on us to fulfill our obligations...they are offering support and encouragement...ideas and recommendations for success...BUT the individual is still responsible for taking the steps and actually doing the work.  And if the individual chooses not to do the work, the individual suffers.  Sure, the team may be disappointed but technically speaking, the individual's failure doesn't directly cause anyone else to fail.  Me not doing my form reps doesn't make Sihing Burke's form terrible...or me not doing my pushups doesn't give Todai Bauer wimpy arms.  As examples...lol.

By choosing to work as partners on the Fan, we created real and direct accountability.  

We relied on each other to show up.  We relied on each other to practice.  We relied on each other to be prepared and ready.  We relied on each other to push, inspire and motivate.  We brainstormed ideas and provided lots of feedback...all specific and applicable because we were in it together.  We forced each other to truly make an effort...not allowing an easy quit.  We had to fight for any change...pleading our case and offering alternatives.  Everything we did, directly impacted someone else.  Simply "not wanting to" wasn't good enough.  We worked hard when training together, and just as hard when we were on our own, not wanting to let each other down.

I had someone relying on me.  If I failed, it wouldn't just be me...but I would also be causing my partner to fail.  And that was never an option.  Even if I had wanted to quit or give up...even just for a bit...I couldn't have.  

If you can create this kind of amicable accountability, you really can't fail.

Balance

I really took advantage of this time off.  Sometimes when I have flexible time, I can spread myself out too thin.  I feel this sense of obligation to use the "extra" time for things that "need" to get done.  And I can feel that sense of obligation pulling me all different ways.  What typically happens is that I don't really get anything accomplished in full.

This year, I mindfully chose to focus on family and friends.  I not only made them A priority, I made them THE priority.  I chose morning coffee with my mom over morning training.  I chose afternoon games with the kids over house obligations.  My relationships with those around me were my priority.  If they wanted to spend their time with me, I said yes, even if that meant postponing something else.

As Shing Ward said (and I really liked this expression) this holiday season was filled with Mindful Mediocrity.  I've said before that I think we often ONLY view mediocrity as a bad thing.  And I don't think it is, necessarily.  If you acknowledge and accept its presence...If you are making the decisions consciously...then the mediocrity is a choice.  And when it's a mindful choice, it sort of takes the sting out of it and it can actually have some benefit.  

Balance. There needs to be a balance.  And I used these last 2 weeks to balance some things out.  I actually feel like I'm getting better at balance and recognizing when it needs to be restored....regardless of which way it might be out of whack.