Not Quite Mine

At this past IHC class on Thursday we practiced our forms to music.  This isn't the first time we've done this, but it was the first time that we did both our weapon form and our hand form.

When I did my hand form to the music, it didn't go all that great.  I found that my mind was split between my form and the music.  I felt distracted and I couldn't seem to bring the two together.  And I'm pretty sure I didn't do my form correctly and I'm certain I flew threw it with zero intent or flow.  

I know Da Mu Hsing.  I've done it exactly 561 times since February 12.  It's not mastered by any means, but I do know it.  But the moment an outside variable was tossed into the mix, everything fell apart.  Thinking about this afterwards I realized this is because Da Mu Hsing isn't quite mine yet.  As Sifu mentioned in class the other night in reference to her working on a specific piece of Lao Gar.....I can do the form...but I don't own the form....it's not mine yet.  I need to work on making it mine.

Da Mu Hsing I-V

Da Mu Hsing I-V.  This was the form I chose for the Year of the Ox.

In hindsight, choosing all 5 sections was what I would now call a somewhat "overenthusiastic" choice and perhaps a rookie move. But nonetheless, I made the commitment and I will follow through with it.  

With parts IV and V never being covered in the level 1 class, it was up to me to learn those later sections via the livestream videos and by utilizing 1-on-1's.  This presented some challenges.  There has been a lot of back and forth with progress videos and several things have been caught that way.  But there’s only so much that can be seen on a screen and it’s been rare that an instructor or higher cue belt has had the opportunity to see my form live.  

Having said that, I think this method of learning has actually provided me with an advantage and a boost in my training. The videos and 1-on-1’s have provided me with the basics, but the development and fine tuning has mostly been up to me.  I’ve really had to pay attention to what’s working and what’s not….what feels right and what doesn’t.  I’ve had to rely on my own self awareness rather than having someone simply point out that I’m doing something wrong.

My training with Da Mu Hsing hasn’t only been advantageous with the form itself…but also in developing the skills that allow me to recognize these finer details on my own.  And whenever you discover something on your own, your ability to retain it…and to apply it in other areas increases exponentially.  

Ultimately, I'm really pleased with how my Da Mu Hsing form is evolving.

Although now that I think about it, it still hasn’t really been seen in a live scenario….so this is sort of an uneducated opinion.  Lol. 

Pushed

This week has been very challenging for me.  Ms Lee’s “Aversive Wednesday’s” come to mind.

There have been a lot of kicks.  And if I had to pick the one thing that I am weakest at, it would be kicks.  And I mean this both physically, and mentally.  I work at them constantly, but they are still a struggle.  Add in all the repetitions, the variety, the bagwork and the race....and I was pushed much further than I ever have been before.  By the end, I was totally and completely gassed.  Thank-you to Ms Poitras for not being easy on me and making me fight for every inch.  Truly.

These classes are what I have been needing.  And I hope there will be more.  Being pushed to the limit keeps me from over-thinking...hesitating...or getting frustrated...because there's just no time.  Keep going, or be left behind.

"Less Yack, more Smack"....wise advice.

Challenges

I know it will probably come as a great shock to all of you, but I like challenges.

Challenges, for me, tend to shake things up a bit to the regular day and provide both physical and mental stimulation.  They are something that generates excitement and engagement with the team and the school.  I enjoy coming up with ways to engage, and help others do the same, and am continually inspired by everyone that participates.  It promotes that feeling of comradery amongst us and they become a common goal that we can work towards together.  And yes, it leaves me with a feeling of accomplishment when I manage to complete them successfully.  When we are on a life long journey, full of ups and downs, as we are in Kung Fu, these little "wins" along the way can help us maintain the momentum we need to continually move forward.  

In addition to all of this, challenges are yet another opportunity to learn.  I enjoy testing various techniques and methods to see what works for me and what doesn't.  I also find it interesting to see what works, or doesn't work, for others.  My intent with challenges isn't that I continue on with it 100% once it ends.  My intent is that I learn something from it, even if I'm not ready to implement that knowledge right away.  As with so many of the things we are being exposed to, once the seeds are planted, they will be there ready to grow when the conditions are right.

Maybe I Should Get Some Fish

As I mentioned at our meeting, I feel like I haven't really had much downtime to reflect or sift through all my thoughts, as of late.  I'm actually pretty sure my share at class was somewhat scattered and disorganized, so I apologize for that.  It's funny, because I had sorted through some things that I was going to share prior to our meeting, and then when the time came I found myself unable to reign them in and present them in a coherent way.  Most things weren't even mentioned.  I started 4 different blogs today, all with plenty of content...none with much direction or clarity.  So I decided to just write this one. 

It’s not a feeling of being overwhelmed.  I typically have a lot going on and am always pretty busy with various projects.  There was a time when Emma was about 3, Nathan just born, we had just moved to the acreage, 2 dogs, 3 feral cats that adopted us….and I decided I needed to get an aquarium and fish.  Whenever things are hectic, it’s now a running joke with my Father in Law that I should get some fish.  But I'm also the type that flourishes with alot going on.  I thrive with the activity.  And I've always been really good at multi-tasking and compartmentalizing, but over the last week or so I can't seem to keep things as orderly as normal.  I would describe it as not being able to decompress or debrief.  If that makes any sense.

So when things don't seem to be flowing as nicely as they normally do, I like to take stock of what's changed....what's different…to see if I can pinpoint the issue.  And there seem to be a couple things.

The first is that I haven’t been blogging as often as I normally do.  This might be because the majority of my computer time has been utilized for the demo video.  And I’ve mentioned before how the more I blog, the more I’m able to progress by reflecting regularly on what I'm doing.  If I’m blogging less, this might be contributing to why I haven’t been able to keep everything as clear and organized as normal.

Something else that has been missing recently from my daily routine is my meditation.  It was cut and replaced by some of the other physical things I've been wanting to accomplish.  But I wonder now if that's something that shouldn't be sacrificed.  I wonder if I have somehow upset the balance I had established.

Only one way to find out I suppose.

IHC Number Update - August 3, 2021

 My August IHC Update

✅ = achieving/exceeding my numbers or generally on track where numbers don't really apply.  

❌ = behind on my numbers, things aren't going well or I haven't taken any steps to complete the goal yet.

➖ = unsure of progress, the opportunity hasn't presented itself yet, it may take the full year to properly evaluate, or it's something I would need my instructors to determine my success/failure.  I've decided to still list these things here just as a reminder that they are still requirements.

⭐ = Complete

Base Requirements

✅  Hand Form - Da Mu Hsing I-V  489/1000

✅  Knife Form - Goju-Shorei Talon  491/1000

✅ Push-ups  24,952/50,000

✅ Sit-ups  24,963/50,000

✅ Sparring  490/1000 *I'd like to get better at my sparring...but I'm not really sure how.  I practice the 1, 2 and 3 step sparring alot...and "jab, reverse, hook, uppercut" is getting a bit overdone....lol.  I had an idea of coming up with some "choreographed" sparring sequences that I could just play out because I really need to incorporate more variety.

✅ Kilometers 952/1609

✅ Acts of Kindness 498/1000

✅ Blogging/Online Presence

✅ Unexcused Absences

➖ Mastery by Stewart Emery - I understand the premise, but certainly can't recite it yet.

✅ Mend a Relationship - I am going camping with my brother in September and he has invited my Dad along.  And I'm actually looking forward to it.

✅  Lion Dancing - we've been working on this in class recently.  I still feel mostly awkward, but I think I'm starting to find some moments of clarity in my movements.

 ❌ Tiger Challenge

✅  Public Performances - Virtual demo...but I'm thinking some live ones will be in my future soon.

➖  Core Curriculum - Instructors call

✅  SRKF Projects and Initiatives - nearing completion of the pushup/situp demo video!

Personal Requirements

➖  Weekly Dharma Talks - I haven't been reading much the last bit as I've been spending most of my spare time on the demo video.   Hmmm....is this an excuse?  Or a reason?  It's sometimes hard to tell.  I suppose I will know once the video is done and that time opens back up.

❌ Pottery - Still haven't gotten back on the wheel.  Although I have been writing down lots of ideas.  But I need take those ideas from paper and actually do them.

❌  Box Jumps - I haven't made one attempt since I fell.  🐔

⭐ Learn how to change my car tires  - Complete.

➖ Learn how to change Oil  - still waiting for an opportunity.  I did assist in bleeding brakes though!  Not sure I'll ever use that knowledge again. lol

✅ Indoor Plant - this is all going really well!  It's just a part of my day and every time I look at them I have a certain sense of pride.  It's funny how plants can make me smile so easily.  I need to get myself a double sided stand of some kind for in front of my windows and then I'll probably expand.

✅ Save for Family Getaway - it's measly but I've started once again.

✅ Compliment Dan, Emma and Nathan at least once a day.

⭐ Children's book - Complete.