Does It Count

I heard someone talking recently about how she gives herself credit for everything.  At 65, practicing Ju Jitsu, she allows herself credit for things that she wouldn’t have considered a big deal at 20.

“If I get to class, I get credit.”

“If I washed my uniform in preparation for class, I get credit.”

What she was really talking about was celebrating even the small wins… because sometimes the smallest step takes a lot of effort.

And it got me thinking…When do I really deserve the credit?

When we roll through the day on autopilot...no thought, no resistance, just doing...the day feels easy. No struggle. No challenge. Is that good… or bad?  We also hear a lot about “effortless effort.” But sometimes, when things become effortless, it’s also a signal that we’ve reached a fork in the road… and if we're not careful, effortless can turn into mindless.

So again…When do I really deserve the credit?

It’s obvious that credit is deserved in the hard choices.  In the moments where I pause, consider doing nothing… and choose action anyway.

But what about the things that come easy?  What about the things I’m naturally good at?  Or the habits I’ve built through discipline?

If I roll out of bed and do 20 pushups without thinking anymore… that’s a good thing, right?  I’m not really convincing myself in that moment...but there was definitely a time that I did.

So maybe that counts too...because these “easy” actions were built on a foundation of hard ones.  There used to be days where it wasn’t automatic.  

So maybe there are two kinds of credit.

The credit I earn right now, when I make the hard choice.

And the credit I carry forward, from the hard choices I’ve already made.

Both matter.  

Both count.  

Because none of it was ever accidental.